I don’t know about you, but when the dishes and the laundry pile up and the dogs won’t stop barking and my kids won’t stop fighting; there is a voice that taunts me in in the chaos. It’s my own.
“I’m the worst”
“I’m a failure”
“I’m a terrible Mom”
These are just a few of the lies I tell myself. I beat myself up when I’m tired or frustrated. I kick myself when I’m down, and I go for the jugular, clinging to my biggest insecurities. Only recently have I started to take notice to the daily abuse I inflict on myself.
I speak affirmations over my children. When they get mad, lose their temper, or act out, I make them say, “I am kind. I am brave. I am strong. I can do hard things.”
I remind them of their greatness when they feel weak, scared, or overwhelmed. I will say to my four year old, “You are so smart” and instead of shooting my compliment down he will say, “I know Mommy.”
He owns it. Embraces it even. Yet, if my husband calls me beautiful, I roll my eyes or point out my dirty hair, tired eyes, and worn out sweats.
If I create a fun activity for my kids and another Mom sends me a sweet message, I immediately feel the need to respond with what a mess I am and that I don’t have this whole raising kids thing figured out.
I’m not writing this searching for complements or affirmations. I’m writing this because I know I’m not the only villain in my own story. I see my beautiful friends. I watch them juggle impossible schedules, family, and work. I see their greatness, and I hear them speak of what they perceive as failures. They see their messy house, rambunctious children, dirty clothes, and laundry list of things they never get time to accomplish. But I see powerful women. I see them as the glue that holds their families together. I see loving supportive wives and mothers. I see hard-working boss babes.
Today, talk to yourself the way you would a toddler. If you lose your temper, remember the root of you is good and kind. If you are afraid of the “what if’s”, remember YOU ARE BRAVE. If you are exhausted and the day feels like it will never end, tell yourself YOU ARE STRONG. If you feel overwhelmed, know YOU CAN DO HARD THINGS.
Love yourself the way you love your child. Be gentle with your heart. You too are learning and growing.
You are kind.
You are brave.
You are strong.
You can do hard things.